Life Can Really Throw Some Curve Balls

Anyone who is breathing on planet earth knows that life is never what we expect. Sure, some may be happier than others and some may seem like that have all the blessings. However, in many cases, we get some major curve balls. Some that seem to hard to bear. Some that make us want to just curl up in a ball and cry.

Hey, maybe I am wrong. Maybe there are a slew of people out there who will read this post and find that they really can’t relate. Well, cool for you. You really are blessed!

Unfortunately, I am smack dab in the middle of one of the hardest times in my life. And, let me tell you, not to brag or anything, but I have had my share of crap in life. Sometimes I wonder what I ever did to have a continual slew of “issues” in life.

It’s really a cherry on top type of trial. I find myself taking 3 showers a day just so I can cry my eyes out without my kids seeing me. I am to the point where if I hear one more Christian cliché I may scream. Really.

Anyway, I have been praying a lot, crying a lot and writing more than ever. I guess that’s a plus. I am focusing on other things. However, the trial is in my face. I cannot escape it. It surrounds me from all sides and all the praying, bible studies and girl chats do nothing to penetrate the hopeless feeling of drowning in a sea of despair feelings I have.

I have found one comfort in all this, a new band I found, 7th Day Slumber. I have been listening to their new worship album, Take Everything, over and over again. It is keeping me from a complete melt down. I really love these guys!

Other than that I am walking more to burn the fat. I really want to lose the blubber, ya know?

As far as my ministry, Moms of Faith, well, I have not been able to do a podcast for a few weeks or even write any meaty devotionals. It all seems so pointless right now.

I mean I am not trying to act like my issues are worse than yours or anyone’s for that matter. I am simply saying I am so tired. I am simply asking what IS is to LIVE a Christian life? Why is it that everywhere I look in the Body, I see lies, selfishness, gossip, slander, secret sin, lack of commitment to Christ, lack of an obedient life, lack of forgiveness and love. I mostly see self absorbed interpretations of Scriptures that were never meant to be manipulated into easier to hear fluff.

Who are we kidding with our cliché phrases, potlucks, pew warming, hallelujahs, and Jesus stickers??? Not the world, that’s for damn sure! They see us for what we really are. They see how SO MANY of us are living secret lives of sin and selfishness. They see the hypocrisy of it all. They see that we are self righteous pansies who think we know it all….when really we know nothing at all.

Maybe that’s why Jesus said the road was narrow and “few” would find it??

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Posted in: God Talk, Me, Ramblings, Venting

This entry was posted on Thursday, November 5th, 2009 at 2:44 pm and is filed under God Talk, Me, Ramblings, Venting. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

5 Responses to “Life Can Really Throw Some Curve Balls”

Heather @ CSAHM November 5th, 2009 at 3:00 pm

I’m really not sure what the world sees. But I do know that there certainly is hope in Jesus.

A lot of us don’t demonstrate what it means to follow Jesus, and sometimes it difficult to explain what experiencing Jesus is like. Maybe that’s why it all comes out so crazy.

I think living a Christian life is walking in God’s will. Being a doer of the Word even if it means conflict, pain, and trials.

Does it all come down to “doing what’s right” – I don’t know, but I do know it’s a great place to start. I also know that God has made some great promises to those who fear the Lord.

It’s also about knowing God and who He really is. He can strike us dead one minute, and give life the next. What happens to us is truly in His hands. I think once we realize this we start living our life according to His will.

Do some Christians have it all wrong, sure. Is it bad for the non-believer to see that Christians have it all wrong, I would think so, but only because the non-believer doesn’t really know much about mercy and grace, or not to judge one another. At least most don’t.

If there is one thing I have learned through trials, it is to simply move closer to God.

Don’t let this trial, or the Christians you are frustrated with move you away from HIM!

Especially if they are in your church, don’t stop going to church, just find a new group of people to hang out with. Don’t stop reading or studying your Bible because you can’t understand what is going on. Doing this stuff will only make things worse. God understands your frustration, pain, and hurt.

I’m always praying for you, Lara. I’ve been praying for you a lot today. My heart goes out to you. {{hugs}}

Lara November 5th, 2009 at 3:04 pm

I love you, Heather! It is nice to have you to chat with and not have to gold it all inside. Ya know?

And no worries. LOL. NOTHING can stop me from loving my Daddy.

You said it right on though when you said “Doers of the Word.” THAT is what it should look like…and NOT our “comfortable” interpretations either.

Thanks for commenting!

Becki November 5th, 2009 at 4:09 pm

Oh my gosh, how freakin refreshing!!!!! Lara, seriously, to read someone finally talk about life having its share of crap – it is about time! And to not fluff it up in the process – just to be real – thank you!

You are absolutely right – who are we kidding?? The world sees right through it – the hidden sick, the fake “hearts for God” – the lack of seriousness in the walk with God – these are reasons people go to church and then just leave and laugh about it all.

We are human, we are real! God knew we would screw it up – why else would He have given us His Son?? He knew life would suck butt! Yes, there is hope, yes the final product of it all is eternal and what we all long for – but while we are here why not just be real and tell people hey, life can suck – because it can!

Refreshing!

Becki November 5th, 2009 at 4:10 pm

that was supposed to be hidden sin… sick hidden sin – typing way too fast there!

Lara November 5th, 2009 at 8:23 pm

I guess I am just fed up. I have been going through a lot and seeing a lot of crap and all together its just making me want to scream! THANK GOD for blogging! ROFL!